Dave: Open Mike With Mike Bullard (Feb. 13th, 1998)

[This aired on Comedy Network.]

[Note: Words in parentheses indicate questionable words.]

["Open Mike" theme]

Announcer: From Studio 99 at Wayne Gretzky's in the heart of Toronto's theater district, it's "Open Mike with Mike Bullard"! Joining Mike tonight, TV and film star Dave Foley! Comic duo "The Devil's Advocates", "Riverdale"'s Melissa DiMarco and musical act "The Barra MacNeils". Plus Orin Isaacs and the "Open Mike" band! From Bay City to Spin City, on line and on cable and on CTV, it's your host Mike Bullard!

[after the monologue]

Mike: Well we got a great show tonight, folks. Dave Foley's here to talk about his new movie! [cheers and applause] Yes! Dave Foley! His new movie "The Wrong Guy" comes out next week. I saw it. It's fabulous. Along with the fork-tongued comics "The Devil's Advocates" are here once again. [cheers and applause] Yes. Melissa DiMarco plays Irene the hairdresser on "Riverdale". [cheers and applause] Yes. And "The Barra MacNeils" are here! [cheers and applause] Plus Orin and the band! Hit it Orin!

[Mike goes to his desk as Orin and the band play. Then Mike does some more material.]

Mike: We'll be right back with NewsRadio's Dave Foley, ladies and gentlemen!

[Clip of Dave's movie. He jumps through a freight train whose doors on either side are open. The caption reads "NEXT… THE RIGHT GUEST THE WRONG GUY…" Back inside Open Mike room, view of band playing. Caption: "NEXT… DAVE FOLEY". Commercial. Band playing.]

Announcer: If you're in the Toronto area and want to see Canada's best musicians, comedians, and celebrities in person, call us at 1-888-394-MIKE. We'd love to see you live in the studio.

Mike: We're back. Our first guest made his name as one of the Kids in the Hall. Since then he's gone on to his own network sitcom "NewsRadio" on NBC and he's currently starring in a new comedy called "The Wrong Guy". Please welcome the man in the suit, Dave Foley!

[Dave comes out wearing jeans, a navy shirt and a black jacket. Mike gets up to welcome him. They shake hands. Audience cheers and applauds. Dave bows to the audience and then to Mike.]

Mike: Dave Foley. Yes. Yes.

[Dave sits down and waves to the audience.]

Dave: [to the audience] Hello.

Mike: That's good. Dave Foley, ladies and gentlemen - the man whose suit is in the cleaners.

Dave: [laughing] Y-yeah.

Mike: Dave Foley.

Dave: Yeah. I'm sor-- I didn't, I didn't know you were gonna introduce me as the man in the suit. (After I'd uh--)

Mike: (Right). I've never seen you without one on.

Dave: [laughing] (I know).

Mike: It's incredible (that) tonight you decided to wear jeans.

Dave: Yeah, well I'm feeling kinda rock 'n roll tonight. I'm gonna kick (out) the jams. Shake it up a little. (Alright).

Mike: [to the band and/or to the audience] Hey, I bet you love this guy.

Dave: Yeah. [laughs]

Mike: [laughing] All right.

Dave: Hey Basil says hi, Orin.

Orin: (?)?

Dave: Yeah.

Orin: Alright. Cool.

Dave: (I was just), just, just talkin' to him a little while ago.

Orin: (?)?

Dave: Yeah, we're doing a little thing for uh Citytv.

Orin: Oh, okay.

Mike: By the way you could walk up to any musician and say 'Basil says hi'.

Dave: [laughing] Yeah. I'm just jokin' 'cause my son is named Basil and you know I don't--

Mike: Your son's name is Basil?

Dave: Yeah I don't meet many Basils.

Mike: How old is he now?

Dave: He's two and a half.

Mike: Wow.

Dave: So he's about ten years away from that damaging him, you know? [laughs]

Mike: [laughing] Yeah. At which point he'll be expected to change it himself, I'm sure.

Dave: Oh yeah, yeah.

Mike: Alright.

Dave: Well we gave him a good decent middle name. (So it's uh)…

Mike: Saw the new movie.

Dave: Oh yeah? Oh good. What do you think? What--

Mike: Loved it.

Dave: Oh thank you.

Mike: It was hilarious.

Dave: Thank you.

Mike: Nice to see Dan Redican in a principal role too.

Dave: Yeah.

Mike: I thought he was great in it as well.

Dave: Yeah. He was, he was fantastic. I'm a, well I'm a huge Dan Redican fan.

Mike: Yeah used to be a story editor on "Kids in the Hall".

Dave: Yes he was, yeah.

Mike: Why don't you tell us a bit about the movie and then we'll watch a clip?

Dave: All right. Well it's a, it's a story of an idiot - [smiling] me - uh who uh when he's passed over for a promotion in his corporation uh throws a fit, uh a childlike tantrum, and then uh goes back to confront his boss and finds him murdered and believes he's horribly-- I have a little bit of-- I need to belch 'cause I had a (Creemore) right before coming out.

Mike: (?).

Dave: This really-- This--

Mike: You go ahead buddy.

Dave: This is embarrassing but I'm very proud of (Creemore) Beer.

Mike: We've been on the, we've been on the network three weeks. I want you to help get us off.

Dave: [laughing] Yeah. Yeah, you know what, I'm-- What--

[Donny, an audience member, laughs in a unique way and Dave turns around to look at him]

Mike: Hey you know in retrospect a little belching might be in order, Dave.

Dave: Sir--

Mike: That's uh Donny, the psycho cop from Nova Scotia.

Dave: That laugh discourages people from being funny, sir.

Mike: [laughs] Yes. Thank you Donny once again for "The Wind in the Willows". [Dave laughs] What a reminder. Now uh y-y-yeah--

Dave: Yeah.

Mike: You were talking, the guy is uh thinki-- Thinks he's killed his boss…

Dave: He, he thinks, he thinks, he thinks that he's horribly implicated himself in a murder.

Mike: Right.

Dave: Not realizing that nobody is after 'im, he goes on the run. And um he inadvertently takes a similar path as the real killer--

Mike: Right.

Dave: --and keeps accidentally drawing the police to the real killer--

Mike: [laughing] Right.

Dave: --to the point where the real killer decides that I'm a brilliant amateur sleuth who he must murder.

Mike: Right. Okay.

Dave: So that's the plot of my motion picture.

Mike: Let's watch the uh, let's watch the clip up here.

Dave: 'Kay.

[Clip. Dave is in an office facing and talking to a man sitting in a chair at a desk.]

Dave: You want to play the staring game? Fine! Two can play the staring game! [Caption: Lions Gate Films] Okay, I can't play the staring game! You win, all right? Big man! You win, all right?! The, the point still remains that you had absolutely no… Okay look maybe this was a bad i-, maybe this was a bad idea.

[Man's head falls on desk. There's blood and a knife in the back of his neck. Dave starts screaming and continues screaming throughout the clip. Goes behind desk and plucks out knife. Blood drips on his shoe from the knife. Puts foot on desk and wipes off shoe with his thumb while he rests his other hand on the man's back. He takes hand off man's back and looks at it. It's bloody. He touches his other arm with it and leaves blood there on his jacket. He opens office door and comes out with the knife in his hand and with bloodstains on his suit. The secretary starts screaming. Another man in that room starts screaming. Clip ends with Dave screaming.]

[cheers and applause]

Mike: Yes. (Alright). Believe me uh, believe me folks, I recommend it highly. That's a lot of value for the money. Now that clip is as long as some Canadian films.

Dave: [laughs] Yeah.

Mike: And has more laughs in it than some. Now you were also the executive--

Dave: Yeah.

Mike: --producer on the shoot.

Dave: Oh yeah. I gotta say this-- Our movie is much funnier than "The Sweet Hereafter". Much funnier.

Mike: You're a brave, brave man, Dave Foley.

Dave: [laughs] I mean sure I laughed when the kids died, but other than that… [Mike laughs, audience groans] Oh come on!

Mike: Dave, I think this might--

Dave: [to the audience] Like I'm serious!

Mike: I think this might be a good time to remind you that you're mainstream now.

Dave: [laughing] Oh right. [laughs]

Mike: Now you were also--

Dave: Oh and so are you.

Mike: Yes that's right.

Dave: That's the problem.

Mike: We both are now.

Dave: Yeah.

Mike: We'll laugh about it after the show. [Dave laughs] You're also the executive producer of the film.

Dave: Yes I am, I am, I'm a co--

Mike: So you wore two hats on that baby.

Dave: I'm a-- Three of them. Co-executive producer, co-wrote it and--

Mike: And bad stuntman.

Dave: Yes. I was a bad stuntman.

Mike: Yes. Apparently you broke your leg?

Dave: I uh sprained both my ankles.

Mike: I'm sorry. Well, two sprains equal one break.

Dave: Yeah. [Dave turns his head and looks at somebody out of view] Yeah what?

Mike: How, how did you manage--

Dave: (Two) people holding stuff up.

Mike: How did you manage to sprain--

Dave: Two m-- um they're distracting (somebody).

Mike: They're, they're, they're holdin' up a commercial sign. I--

Dave: Calling up an abbreviation of commercial.

Mike: I believe it's a commercial for "The Wrong Guy" and they've seen the clip. So let's relax.

Dave: Okay.

Mike: All right Elton.

Dave: We're, we're done? What?

Mike: No, Elton's apparently not in an amusing mood this evening. We have to go to commercial. We'll be right back with more Dave Foley--

Dave: All right.

Mike: --after these messages. [to Dave] Can you stick around?

Dave: Yeah.

[Clip. Caption: "COMING UP… MORE FUN WITH DAVE". Dave and Jennifer Tilly are in a car in a field. The car stops. Jennifer is in the driver seat with her head on the steering wheel. Dave is in the passenger seat.]

Dave: (Honey)? Honey? Are you all right? Are you okay?

Jennifer: Hmm. [lifts head] Ah. Did I ((?) my smells) again?

Dave: I'm guessing you did.

[Clip ends. Orin playing. Commercial. Band playing.]

Mike: All right, folks! We're back with uh Dave Foley! We're gonna be talking a little more but I must apologize to The Devil's Advocates. We'll have them back another time. I know it'll be a great disappointment to them but hell we've done it to them before and Dave's way more famous than they are so we're gonna keep talkin' to Dave.

[cheers and applause]

Mike: Yes. (Applaud). All right?

Dave: It's true.

Mike: Now we were talking about the fact that you had sprained both ankles during the filming of the movie. How'd you do that?

Dave: Um well there's a, there's a scene in the movie-- well I mean I guess you saw it. There was a little clip you rolled where I jump through the freight car but - which I actually did with the sprained ankles - uh but there's a scene earlier where I, where I, I jump into a trash dumpster.

Mike: Yeah, yeah.

Dave: When I see a cop and I run up an alley and jump into this dumpster and, and we did it the first time and I jumped up 'n did, did the flip into the dumpster and, and you know everything went fine and--

Mike: It's a great (send-up). A lot of those scenes were a great (send-up)--

Dave: Yeah.

Mike: --with the genre. You know the Hitchcock films, the guy on the run.

Dave: Yeah. Oh. [laughs]

Mike: Some of those scenes were absolutely hilarious.

Dave: Yeah but--

Mike: I mean you, you gotta see it for the water-cooler scene or the water bottle scene a lot.

Dave: [laughing] Oh that. Yeah.

Mike: Yeah I loved that.

Dave: Yeah. That was a Dave Higgins joke. Yeah.

Mike: A which?

Dave: But, but I didn't sprain my ankles the first time. The second-- I, I actually was gonna say-- I sprained them the second time. I, I actually went up to David Steinberg our director and said, "You know what? I think it'll be funny if I got a little more extension--

Mike: Yeah.

Dave: --on it." So, so I insisted on doing a second take.

Mike: "If I took a bigger risk."

Dave: They were all set to move on and I said, "Let's do a second take. I just think it'll be funny if I got a little more height--

Mike: Yeah.

Dave: --a little more extension."

Mike: Yeah.

Dave: So I went up, did a little higher flip and came down and caught both of my ankles on the ends of, end of the dumpster. And it was one of these things where like in slow-motion I watched them buckle over like, sorta like, sorta like the 'Wicked Witch of the East' underneath the, underneath the house.

Mike: Right.

Dave: Just rolling up you know?

Mike: Oh my god.

Dave: And uh--

Mike: Yeah.

Dave: --and so I was uh-- We shut down production for a few days. [laughs]

Mike: There's one scene I wanna ask you about. There's a scene where you jump into a freight car and uh you're on the run, you get on a freight train--

Dave: Uh huh.

Mike: --and the car you're in is full of canned ham so you decide to subsist on those while you're on the train.

Dave: Mm hmm.

Mike: And the boxes are labeled "Thompson Canned Hams". [Dave laughs] Is there some kind of secret message there to an old pal or…?

Dave: To Scott you mean?

Mike: [laughing] Yeah. Yeah.

Dave: No.

Mike: [laughing] No?

Dave: That was--

Mike: [laughing] (I just)--

Dave: That was, that really was because we couldn't get clearance on Thomas's Canned Hams.

Mike: Right. So you just (?) use Thompson.

Dave: And so, so the art department switched to Thompson--

Mike: Right.

Dave: --and which is in no way to say that, that Scott Thompson is in the ham because lord knows he is. Uh but--

Mike: What about the box that had McCulloch Canned Hams with the stroke through it? Nothing? [laughs]

Dave: Um that-- No relationship and… and the pizza--

Mike: Wasn't there Dave. Take it easy.

Dave: No, and the pizza, the pizza from "McDonald's and Idiot Pizza" uh was completely coincidental.

Mike: Okay. Good. Yeah we had a 'Sealy Puncture-Pedic' mattress here. We got in big trouble the next day.

Dave: [laughing] Yeah.

Mike: I know where you're coming from. I lied too. Now uh, you've got that great series down in NewsRadio and I gotta tell you--

Dave: Uh huh.

Mike: --it's on NBC - whenever I can find it I love to watch it.

Dave: (Oh yes, thank you).

Mike: But it's the most difficult show to find on television. What the hell's the story there?

Dave: Well we're in deep cover. Uh… our--

Mike: You don't want anyone to see it Dave?

Dave: Our show is produced specifically for the CIA. Uh… it's uh-- N, NBC is um, NBC, NB-- you know they're proud as a peacock, you know that (?)--

Mike: [laughing] Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Dave: --[laughing] um but probably not so proud of us.

Mike: I cannot believe they would not be proud of that show.

Dave: They move us constantly and, and, and lo and behold they're moving us again. They're moving us to uh-- We're going back to Wednesday night, which is, which is the NBC equivalent of sending us to Siberia. Um…

Mike: Why is Wednesday night such a bad night? I thought Friday and Saturday were the worst nights.

Dave: No, Wednesday's a bad night because Wednesday-- Wednesday's a bad night for NBC because it is a great night for ABC.

Mike: Oh okay.

Dave: ABC just rules uh Wednesday night. Uh Saturday is, Saturday is NBC's way of saying, "Bank some money." Uh but, but, but Wednesday's just a way of saying--

Mike: Right.

Dave: --"We don't like you."

Mike: Yeah. Yeah.

Dave: "But we're not going to set you free." [laughs]

Mike: The paychecks are coming in?

Dave: Yeah, yeah.

Mike: (Alright). Good.

Dave: Yeah.

Mike: Now you're on that show with another ex-patriot Canadian. Phil Hartman.

Dave: Oh yep, Phil Hartman, yeah.

Mike: Yeah. No doubt about it Phil.

[cheers and applause]

Mike: An amazing uh--

Dave: He's a very funny man.

Mike: --an amazing guy and by all accounts--

Dave: Yeah.

Mike: --not a prima donna at all. This, this man's--

Dave: No.

Mike: --talent is unbelievable. You know he designed all kinds of album, album covers--

Dave: "(Poco)".

Mike: --in the seventies? Yeah, "(Poco) (?)".

Dave: "America".

Mike: Yeah.

Dave: He did the "America" co-, the "America" uh album cover. Po-- Yeah. His, his brother was a rock 'n roll manager and he was a, a--

Mike: Graphic artist.

Dave: Graphic artist.

Mike: Yeah.

Dave: Yeah.

Mike: It's an incredible story. I don't think a lot of people knew that but uh…

Dave: Mm hmm.

Mike: Now is he a, is he a good guy to work with? Do you discuss uh the old home territory or…

Dave: Yeah he is a good guy to work-- I mean he's like, he's, he's like, really, really, really solid. I mean he's like a really great profe-- I mean what I admire as a really great professional comic. He's like really consistent. I mean like when he was on SNL he was like…

Mike: Right.

Dave: You know…

Mike: He's like Michael Kane. He's been in some bad things but he's never--

Dave: Yeah.

Mike: --turned in a bad performance.

Dave: Oh I know. Well actually the first time I've met Phil when we first sat down to the first table read, the first thing I said to him was, "Phil, I'm gonna guess this is something you hear a lot. You were the best thing in that!" [laughing] (Well you know).

Mike: Yeah, yeah.

Dave: 'Cause he's been, yeah 'cause he's been--

Mike: (Aren't you sorry about that)? You hear that sometimes that the critics never write he was the best thing in a bad thing.

Dave: [laughing] Y-y-yeah.

Mike: You know? They dislike everybody--

Dave: Yeah.

Mike: --a lot of the times. It's pretty terrible. How do you find the US audience is as opposed to the Canadian?

Dave: Um…

Mike: People comin' up to you in the States a lot, recognizing you?

Dave: I find them-- You know it's pretty similar you know? I mean it's uh… Yeah the, you know, the US audience much like the Canadian audience thinks that we've been cancelled several times. Uh… [laughing] So…

Mike: Hey cheer up. You'll be on CBC at midnight.

Dave: [laughing] Yeah.

Mike: You wait 'n see. Wait 'n see (?) CBC at midnight. Now I noticed uh one thing about the uh the old days with uh Kids in the Hall. You played so many characters on that show but I gotta tell you one thing. Okay?

Dave: Alright.

Mike: You, in drag, were the most attractive.

[cheers and applause]

Dave: Mike. (Thank you).

Mike: (I know)-- I uh, I'm sorry.

Dave: That's all right.

Mike: I know you uh, I know you hate to talk about it but many--

Dave: I--

Mike: --nights after a couple of beers in my rec room I was riveted.

Dave: [laughs] Well… I would've thought you'd wait till later to start flirting but… what the hell?

Mike: Will you never--

Dave: You have a, you have a certain manly charm yourself.

Mike: Thanks Dave.

Dave: Uh…

Mike: Thank you very much. I am in drag right now.

Dave: [laughing] Yeah. Yeah. (Not bad).

Mike: I was gonna discu-discuss our mutual love for clothes but I don't think now's a good time. [Dave laughs] Dave Foley ladies and gentlemen! How about a big hand for 'im? Go and watch the movie!

Dave: [to the audience and/or to the camera] Please.

Mike: Stay tuned for the Barra MacNeils ladies and gentlemen!

[Band playing. Commercial. Band playing.]

Mike: All right. You know folks uh you're always welcome to come down to the studio to see the show live Monday to Friday and we'd love to see ya and uh we hope that uh--

[Transmission interrupted by a Devil's Advocates piece. They talk for a while and somewhere along the line one of them says to Mike, "We're not done with you yet. If you're going to be a big successful talk show host we're gonna ride in your coattail, damn it." At the end they say "Bye-bye." Back to the "Open Mike" room.]

Mike: Bye-bye fellas. Yes. As if I, as if I don't have enough baggage of my own. I wanna be carrying those two around with me. That's great. You ever seen them Dave?

Dave: Uh no.

Mike: (Starred) in Second City and eventually moved to Speakers Corner. It's a sad, sad thing actually. Stay tuned for the Barra MacNeils ladies and gentlemen! We'll be right back.

[Clip of Barra MacNeils video. Caption: "NEXT… CELTIC CROONERS THE BARRA MacNEILS". Commercial. Band playing.]

Announcer: Questions, comments, suggestions? E-mail Mike at info@open-mike.com. Or visit the Open Mike website at www.open-mike.com.

Mike: Ladies and gentlemen, they're part of the (roots) music craze that's sweeping through the nation and they're here to sing "Mouth Music" from their CD "Until Now". From God's country in Nova Scotia please welcome The Barra MacNeils!

[cheers and applause]

[song]

[Cheers and applause. Mike goes over, shakes hands with one of the Barra MacNeils and gives a rose to another.]

Mike: "The Barra MacNeils" ladies and gentlemen!

[Commercial. Band playing.]

Announcer: If you're in the Toronto area and want to see Canada's best musicians, comedians, and celebrities in person, call us at 1-888-394-MIKE. We'd love to see you live in the studio.

[Three of the Barra MacNeils are sitting down on panel chairs. Two others and Dave are standing behind them.]

Mike: We're back folks. I'm sitting here with "The Barra MacNeils", in particular Lucy. That was lovely. Thank you very much--

Lucy: Oh.

Mike: --for singing for us. It was beautiful.

Lucy: Thank *you* very much.

Mike: And we had "(The Laheys)" on last week.

Lucy: Whoo!

Mike: There's five of you in the family. Eleven in theirs. What is it with you Celtic bands?

Lucy: Well-- There's--

Mike: You never heard of the post-nuclear family?

Lucy: There's actually six in ours. I've five--

Mike: There's six in yours?

Lucy: I have five brothers and no sisters.

Mike: Five brothers! My god. From Cape Breton?

Lucy: Yeah.

Mike: Good. Well it was lovely to have you here and I wanna thank you and uh normally I don't uh talk to the musicians anymore because too many of the punk bands have tried to kill me.

Lucy: Well if you keep giving them roses, (you know, you'd be fine).

Mike: Yeah. Maybe that was where I went wrong. You're the first person it was appropriate to give a rose to. Thank you very much Lucy. All right. [cheers and applause] Ladies and gentlemen! Next week's guests include "Once a Thief"'s Vicky Pratt, crossover star Rod Jeremy - yeah crossover star. 'Cause he wears pants now he's a crossover star. All right. [Donny laughs] Stop it Donny. WWF star Hunter Hurst Helmsley and comedian Tracy Almond's gonna be here. [cheers and applause] Yes. Plus musical guest "David Deacon and The Word", Sheddy Kemp and "Bow Wow Wow". [cheers and applause] Dave Foley's "The Wrong Guy" opens in theatres next week in Toronto and Montreal! Thank you Dave! What a pleasure! [Cheers and applause. Dave waves to the audience, bows and mouths/says "Thank you."] Check it out! The Barra MacNeils' CD "Until Now" is in stores now. Our apologies for not getting to Melissa DiMarco. We've actually legitimately bumped one for the first time in our, our brief, brief tenure as a talk show. I'm sorry Melissa. I sell the pictures, believe me I'm sorry. We'll get her on at her earliest convenience and I'm on The Comedy Network and we're also on CTV now. No more countdown. Goodnight ladies and gentlemen! It was a real pleasure!

[Cheers and applause. "Open Mike" theme. Mike and Barra MacNeils get off chairs. A lady takes a picture of all of them together (including Dave). Then they hang around and talk to each other. View of the band playing. Blackout.]

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