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Season Five (1994)

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Episode Pages

Each episode from the fifth season has its own page. On the pages are information, links to transcripts, and perhaps other media. Click an episode number to visit its page.

501 | 502 | 503 | 504 | 505 | 506 | 507 | 508 | 509 | 510
511 | 512 | 513 | 514 | 515 | 516 | 517 | 518 | 519 | 520 | 521

 

Episode Guide

Reprinted below is an episode guide for season five as it appeared in the old alt.tv.kids-in-hall FAQ. (Only change: added episode numbers which link to episode pages.) It is reprinted here to be used to help find the skit or show you are interested in; then you can click the episode page.

This episode guide is not authored or updated by KITHfan.org. There are some mistakes and omissions, all of which should be fixed on the accompanying episode page.

If you need help reading this guide, see the help page. Also, many people helped in the creation of the old FAQ, thank you to them all.

#501
 Idiot Boy at Work (DS)(5): Idiot Boy is causing problems at work (Idiot Boy)
 Police Department (BMS)(5): 10:00 a.m. Precinct House - Did you kill that guy? (Police Department)
 You've Gained Weight (DK)(5): woman with eating disorder discusses weight problems
 Police Department (BMS)(5): 6:00 p.m. Precinct House - Did you kill that guy? (Police Department)
 Feelyat! (KMSD)(5): bizarre foreign-language game show (& news bulletin) (Darryl)
 Brian's Been Arrested (S)(5): Fran tells how Brian was arrested (Fran)
 Police Department (BMS)(5): 11:00 p.m. Precinct House - Did you kill that guy? (Police Department)
 The Beard (all)(5): Man's beard takes over his life (Nena)

#502
 Police Department (SMB)(5): 10:00 a.m. Precinct House - "conclusion" of "Did you kill that guy?" (Police Department)
 Disgusting Old Man (KMDJ)(5): old man asks neighbor to turn over his wife (Disgusting Old Man)
 The Chosen One Thinker (BDK)(5): fast food crew chief/chosen one thinks
 Chance Meeting* (B)(5): the story of a man's and woman's chance meeting (directed by Bruce)
 Police Department (SMBD)(5): 9:00 p.m. Precinct House - Did you kill that guy? (Police Department)
 Firing Documentary (KDM)(5): man makes documentary of being fired from work
 Police Department (SMB)(5): Did you kill that guy?
 Grizzly* (KMD)(5): man encounters a "bear" while hunting for chicks
 Police Department (SMBD)(5): 1:00 a.m. Precinct House - real "conclusion" of "Did you kill that guy?" (Police Department)

#503
 Whores (DSK)(5): drumming up business (Whores, Rudy)
 Meet Your New Male Slave (SKDM)(5): Buddy gets a new male slave [Mark narrates] (Buddy)
 Someone Doesn't Like You (MDK)(5): man discusses a guy who doesn't like a friend
 Whores (SD)(5): rap music (Whores)
 Poreef (BMS)(5): Money-Momentum guys sell new product in a grocery store (Money-Momentum Guys)
 The Tattoo (BS)(5): man reveals his deep hidden secret
 The Hit* (DSMB)(5): man hires hit man to kill himself (Police Department, Thug) (directed by Dave)

#504
 God is Dead (all)(5): newsreel footage of the death of God
 New Boots* (BSKD)(5): workers with steel-toed boots go to the job (directed by Bruce)
 Accelerated-Time Breakup (KD)(5): time accelerates whenever man leaves wife
 Whores (SDK)(5): new price list (Whores, Rudy)
 Buddy's Bar -- Montreal (S)(5): Buddy talks about Montreal (Buddy)
 Whores (SD)(5): johns who can't pay (Whores)
 Dipping Areas (all)(5): a restaurant kitchen discussion about the mousse dipping areas

#505
 Steps* -- Gay Pride (all)(5): gay pride day (Steps, Police Department)
 Stump Hand Waiter (SDKB)(5): the waiter with stumps for hands (Danny Husk?)
 Butt Freak Film Buff (DM)(5): the guy who likes a certain type of movie scene
 Gavin at the Police Department (BKS)(5): Gavin registers a complaint at the police department (Gavin)
 Steps* -- Gay Pride (DSK)(5): gay pride day continued (Steps)
 Guy Who Consoles People in Hospital (DMBKJ)(5): the guy who consoles crying people in the hospital
 Steps* -- Gay Pride (DSK)(5): gay pride day continued (Steps)
 Evan the Stereo Salesman (BKM)(5): Evan the intense stereo salesman (Evan, Satan, Murray)

#506
 Fight-Picking Guy - This Close (SD)(5): guy in bar who wants to get in a fight
 Weston & Virgil in 1972 (SMB)(5): Weston & Virgil at school in 1972 (Weston Esterhazy, Virgil)
 Power-Mad after Promotion (KDM)(5): mail clerk gets promoted and goes power-mad
 Sick about Crime (D)(5): experienced cop gets sick about lawbreakers
 Laundromat Business Opportunities (MB)(5): businessman tries to lease underwear
 Fight-Picking Guy - Up Your Craw (SK)(5): guy in bar who wants to get in a fight
 Post-Apocalypse Poets (KMB)(5): post-apocalypse poets smokes pot and writes songs
 Fight-Picking Guy - Hey! (SM)(5): guy in bar who wants to get in a fight
 Coal-Shoveler with Angst (BM)(5): coal shoveler questions life

#507
 Slow Motion Trick (MDK)(5): guy acts slow to make friend leave
 Ex-Girlfriend Relocation (MKD)(5): guy wants to have ex-girlfriend relocated
 Whores (DS)(5): looking for a hooker with a heart of gold (Whores)
 Love (B): Bruce monologue about love
 Breast-Obsessed Businessman (KDS)(5): man obsessed with secretary's breasts
 Whores (DS)(5): "Want a date?" joke backfires (Whores)
 Naive Duck Hunting (SM)(5): hunting-naive companions go duck hunting
 Whores (DS)(5)
 They Love Me in France (all)(5): why Kevin is popular only in France

#508
 555-SLUT (none): gross guy's phone sex ad
 Chicken Lady at the Mall (DMSB)(5): Chicken Lady masturbates at the mall (Chicken Lady)
 Old People (B)(5): Bruce monologue about old people
 Office Joker Revenge (MKB)(5): man wants to get revenge against office joker
 555-SLUT (none)(5): gross guy's phone sex ad
 Exercise Class Instructors (MBS)(5): exercise class teachers have a fight
 555-SLUT (D)(5): friend-of-gross-guy's phone talk ad
 Embarrasing Dinner (KSDM)(5): man's companion snorts coke at dinner (Smitty)

#509
 Steps* -- Coming Out (DSK)(5): Steps guys discuss coming out to their parents (Steps)
 Crab Shampoo (KM)(5): American in Canada wants crab shampoo
 Obfuscator Boyfriend (DB)(5): man obfuscates about moving in together
 Mr. Tisane's Tea Problem (KMD)(5): Mr. Tisane addicted to tea (Mr. Tisane)
 Boiled Potatoes (MDSK)(5): a man has an idea for a new restaurant
 Steps* -- Movie (KDSB)(5): Steps guys see Intimate Circumstances (Steps)

#510
 Lick Town Clean (DK)(5): residents must lick the town clean
 Agents in the Bar (SMK)(5): the Sudelmans in the bar order drinks after last call (Sudelmans)
 The Lovers 3* (DM)(5): the lovers talk about their love (directed by Mark)
 Noisy Kid (MBKD)(5): man in line complains about a yakky kid
 Dave/Elk (DS)(5): comparison of Dave and an elk [Scott narrates]
 Humpback Gays (BS)(5): gay pair discusses one guy's hump (Butchie?)
 The Lovers 4* (DM)(5): the lovers talk about their love (directed by Mark)
 My Training* (BKM)(5): man who participates in competitive bathtub-soaking

#511
 The Test-Tube Baby (SD)(5): man complains about being a test-tube baby
 Kathie & Dry Cleaner (BMSK)(5): Kathie sleeps with dry cleaner (Kathie, Cathy, Tanya, Secretary, Bigot Cabbie)
 Whores (DSK)(5): first timer (Whores, Rudy)
 Starving Street Singers (BKM)(5): street singers look for food (Street Singers)
 Communist Threat (DK)(5): man talks about the communist threat
 Whores (SK)(5): Maudre pretends to be Rudy's wife (Maudre, Rudy)
 Man's Girlfriend's Jobs (all)(5): man who wants girlfriends with various jobs

#512 (Not in FAQ)
 Shoe Shine--He's not stoned; he's just noticing things.
 The Monkeys--Be afraid. Be very afraid; he might let the monkeys loose.
 You Scuzzy Piece of Filth!--He dialed wrong.
 Raj and Christine: Temporary Roommates--She contributes; she shoplifted for him.
 Husk Musk--The bottled scent of Danny.

#513
 Clothes-Talker (K)(5): man talks to his clothes
 Sid & Sharisse Wedding (all)(5): Sid & Sharisse get married (Sid, Sharisse, Sid's Friend)
 Whores (DSM)(5): film producer (Whores)
 Darn Near Puked (BSK)(5): office workers discuss "gross" things
 Whores (DS)(5): high heels and old boyfriends (Whores)
 Scott's Vision (SM)(5): Scott has a vision after reading a list of men who died of AIDS
 Again! Again! (SKBM)(5): old man asks women to dance in their underwear

#514
 Police Department (BM)(5): 2:16 p.m. Cherry Beach - madness in L.A. (Police Department)
 Bleeding Ear (KDB)(5): man's ear starts bleeding at dinner
 Bikini Inspector (B)(5): man complains about "Bikini Inspector" T-shirts
 Wedding at Buddy's (SKM)(5): Buddy conducts a marriage ceremony (Buddy)
 This Scene Was Written in Haste...* (SDK)(5): a sketch written in haste
 Hi-Tech Car Alarm (M)(5): Tucker followed by a car after setting off its alarm (Tucker)

#515
 Cyclops (SD)(5): cyclops at a party
 The Convenience Store Worker (all)(5): A convenience store clerk has his performance reviewed by executives
 Hillbilly's Problem (MDSKJ)(5): A hillbilly has some problems after his cow kicks him in the head (Nurse Unloop)
 Fran the Italian (SM)(5): Fran feels out of sorts (Fran)

#516
 Wrote the Report Naked (DKS)(5): free spirit writes a report (Danny Husk, A.T. & Love Boss, Bingo the Clown)
 Don't Shut off My Cable! (SM)(5): Korean War vet doesn't want to lose his cable (Disgusting Old Man)
 My Gazebo! (all)(5): woman's gazebo disappears (Police Department)
 Scott on Los Angeles (S)(5): a monologue from Scott on a dream he had
 Carlo the Scientist (BM)(5): Darryl participates in an experiment (Darryl)

#517
 Greater Possibilities (DK)(5): Man with submarine for an office
 Steps Guys at Home (SDK)(5): Butch calls 555-JERK (Steps)
 "Living Proof" Press Conference (MKB)(5): Band dies in a bus crash
 Big Bucks* (B)(5): Man with a bizarre job gets the big bucks (directed by Bruce)

#518
 Band Killer (BKM)(5): Capture of a serial killer (Police Department)
 Brown Stuff (DS)(5): A.T. & Love boss has a problem (Danny Husk, A.T. & Love Boss)
 I'm Late (KB)(5): The perfect couple practices being perfect
 Steps* -- AIDS (DKS)(5): Steps guys discuss AIDS (Steps)
 Bye Stan* (all+J)(5): Guy wishes everyone a good weekend (Danny Husk, Cathy, Kathie, Ms. Ferguson?)
 Bellini Day (BMDP)(5): Aliens celebrate Bellini Day (Paul Bellini, sorta)

#519
 Francesca, Bruno, & the Voiceover Guy (SDM)(5): voiceover guy corrects Francesca's grammar (Francesca Fiore, Bruno Puntz Jones)
 Sperm Bank I (SMBK)(5): the humanoids rob a sperm bank (Humanoids for Humanism)
 The Queen at Tea (DKS)(5): the Queen drops by unexpectedly for tea (The Queen)
 Sperm Bank II (MBK)(5): sperm bank continued (Tucker, Armada in stills)
 Man of Destiny (D)(5): a busy guy
 Sperm Bank III (BM)(5): sperm bank continued (Police Department in still)
 Heart Channel (all)(5): a truly bizarre pledge drive (Nena, Murray, Doctor, Nurse Unloop, Terrier)
 Sperm Bank IV (-)(5): sperm bank concluded

#520
 Noisy Roommates (DK)(5): man has problems with his "44" noisy roommates
 Memoirs (SD)(5): husband and wife read "Memoirs" and reminesce
 Journey to the Top of the Stairs (KSM)(5): a musical number

#521 (Final Episode)
 End of the Beginning (P)(5): Bellini listens to the radio (Paul Bellini)
 Armada Grows Old (MBK)(5): Armada sees the future (Armada)
 The Sixth Kid (all)(5): Jeff Berman tribute
 Buddy's Bar - Closure (S)(5): Buddy closes the bar
 On Censorship (KDB)(5): "recap" of censored episodes
 A.T.&Love Buyout (all)(5): Everyone is fired (Cathy, Kathie, Tanya, Ms. Ferguson, Secretary, A.T.&Love Boss)
 Burial (all+P)(5): the boys are buried and Bellini speaks! (Paul Bellini)

#522 (Compilation Episode)
 God is Dead (all)(5): newsreel footage of the death of God
 Chicken Lady at the Mall (DMSB)(5): Chicken Lady masturbates at the mall (Chicken Lady)
 Hillbilly's Problem (MDSKJ)(5): A hillbilly has some problems after his cow kicks him in the head (Nurse Unloop)
 The Convenience Store Worker (all)(5): A convenience store clerk has his performance reviewed by executives
 Meet Your New Male Slave (SKDM)(5): Buddy gets a new male slave [Mark narrates](Buddy)
 Disgusting Old Man (KMDJ)(5): old man asks neighbor to turn over his wife (Disgusting Old Man)

 

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Contributors to this Page

 Images- Trista Lycosky
 Episode Guide- The original alt.tv.kids-in-hall FAQ

 

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