Birth of a Nation

Transcribed from: Comedy Central
Transcribed by: Lindsay Ragis


The scene takes place in a park. "BIRTH OF A NATION" is printed on the screen and Dave, Mark, Kevin, and Scott are seen in the distance. Kevin has his back to the camera and Scott, Mark, and Dave are surrounding him facing the camera.

Kevin: (in a voice that sounds like Mark's, while shaking his arms and fist) Wrong wrong wrong wrong wrong! It's my opinion, not your opinion, not your opinion, it's mine!

"FACISM" appears on the screen as Kevin is talking. Dave is hanging his head and Scott and Mark are getting angry. Mark is the first one to attack Kevin. As the three begin to assault Kevin, "DEMOCRACY" eventually appears on the screen. Mark pushes Kevin and then everyone starts to push him around. Mark kicks and hits Kevin while Dave holds him, the three of them begin to throw Kevin around, they push him to the ground, pull him up, swing him around, and then Kevin falls to the ground again where Scott and Dave hold him down while Mark kicks him. During this semi-battle words such as "hey!, ow!, get him!, oh!, swing him!, and hya!" are being yelled.

Kevin: Wait! Wait! Do you know what your problem is? You guys don't listen.

Scott, Mark, and Dave stop and listen to Kevin as he slowly gets up off of the ground.

Kevin: Ahh let me just say something here . . .

Kevin runs away and Mark grabs him by his coat and rips it off. The scene ends with Scott and Dave catching up to Kevin and grabbing him.

Credit to Kids in the Hall/Broadway Video