Mississippi Gary: Life-After-Death Song

Obtained from: Kids in the Hall FAQ
Transcribed by: ?
[spoken]
You know, recently, I had a heart attack. For several minutes Mississippi Gary was clinically dead. I was followin' the white light to heaven. Now when I got there, I was given a choice of 17 door. Now behind the first door was a rose, which signified... never mind that. An angel of the Lord then came to me, and give me a 7-sided die, which he bade me to roll 12 time. Now the first roll was a 4, which means that the four corners of the world... well never mind that. Eventually I was brought in front of God himself. Now God was sittin' up on a bar stool with an old beat-up guitar. And he said to me, "Mississippi Gary, you is not to be dead yet. Because I want you to take this here song, and play it for all my children on the planet Earth." So I learned this song, and it meant so very much to me, so I like y'all at home to turn on your VCR's, so you can learn it and study it. The words of God.

[sung]
Smokin' on a night train, chewin' on a jelly roll,
Smokin' on a night train, chewin' on a jelly roll,
I'm runnin' up a flag without a pole,
I'm walkin' on a shoe without a sole,
Smokin' on a night train, chewin' on a jelly roll.

(OK here i' comes, lesson one.)
You can't cook an egg unless you got yourself a frying pan.
(You know it's the truth.)
You can't cook an egg unless you got yourself a frying pan.
You shouldn't rob a bank without a plan,
You shouldn't use your tongue to stop a fan.
Smokin' on a night train, chewin' on a jelly roll.

(Now here come lesson number two.)
Shouldn't wanna do it if you don't want to not do it right.
Eba-dabba-dooba-daba-deba-daba-do, all right.
(I ain't makin' this up.)
You don't go dancin' in the day,
You don't golfin' in the night.
Smokin' on a night train, chewin' on a jelly roll.
(Yeah.)
Smokin' on a night train, chewin' on a jelly roll.

Praise the Lord!


Credit to Kids in the Hall/Broadway Video