Mr. Heavyfoot Hates the Movie

Transcribed from: Comedy Central
Transcribed by: Sarah Jane Bodell
Cast- [Set in a movie theatre]

Movie actor: So I get up to go eat something, but she sleep till one!

[Screen reads:
"M. Piedlourde Deteste le Film"
Mr. Heavyfoot Hates the Movie]

Movie actress: Oh, come on! He's always so self-centered! He doesn't see how much I do.

Movie actor: She even resents my puttering around the house. I ask her how she could complain about that.....

Movie actress: I never complain! That's not true!

[Mr. Heavyfoot places hat on head, stand and begins to walk across crowded row. Not being able to lift his heavy feet, he steps on eveyone's feet.]

Person 1: Ow!!! [She rises to let him by]

Person 2: Hey!!! [he rises as well]

Person 3: [rises but is still stepped on] D'oh!!!

[Dissolve to: Lights come on in theatre, by now everyone's gone. Except, Mr. Heavyfoot. He's been there for hours trying to climb the inclined aisle to leave. Movie usher cleaning gives him a strange look. Mr. Heavyfoot shoots a mean look back at him.]

[Screen reads:
The End]

Credit to Kids in the Hall/Broadway Video