Cops: Abandoned Potato

Transcribed from: Comedy Central
Transcribed by: Devri Richmond

Cast:

• Mark- Cop
• Bruce- Cop

[Title reads: 9:34 P.M. Welland Park. Bruce is standing near the car. He looks down, picks up a potato.]

Bruce: Hey. [Mark comes over.] What do you make of this?

Mark: It's a potato.

Bruce: Yeah, I know it's a potato, but I found it on the asphalt here. Why would anyone abandon a perfectly good potato?

Mark: I don't know.

Radio Dispatcher: [From car.] Uh, attention all units, a lone potato has been reported at Young and Saint Joseph. All nearby units will respond.

Mark: Man, this town just keeps getting sicker and sicker.

Bruce: Yeah I know.

[Bruce throws the potato up and catches it like a baseball. They walk away.]