Try it NOW!

Transcribed from: Comedy Central
Transcribed by: Matt Morrison (herogreenlantern@hotmail.com)
Cast: [Scene: Suburbia in winter. Outside a house. It is cold and icy.]

[Kevin comes from the house and gets in the passenger side of the white car. Scott is in the drivers seat, trying to get the car to start.]

Kevin: What's wrong honey?

Scott: Darn thing won't start.

Kevin: Maybe the [ponders] spark plugs aren't firing?

Scott: Thanks for the tip honey, but would you let me please?

Kevin: Okay.

[Scott tries to start the car again. It doesn't work]

Scott: WHAT IS WRONG?! I know!

[Scott lifts the hood and looks at the engine. He doesn't do anything. He just looks at it.]

Scott: Try it now.

[Kevin starts the car but nothing happens. Scott closes the hood]

Scott: Try it now.

[Kevin tries it. Doesn't work]

Kevin: It's not starting.

Scott: Damn! Hmm...

[Scott kicks the front left tire]

Scott: Try it now.

[Kevin tries it. Doesn't work]

[Scott moves to the back of the car and kicks the back left tire]

Scott: Try it now.

[Kevin tries to start it while Scott keeps kicking the tire in the hubcap and pushing on the car from behind]

Scott: Come on! Giver her some juice! Crank her! Crank her! Come on! Come on!

[They both stop and Scott moves to the drivers door]

Scott: Rats! I just don't get it! I'm just don't get it.

[Scott washes the windshield.]

Scott: Try it now.

[Kevin tries with the same success as before]

Scott: Hmm.

[Scott paints the car red with a can of spray paint]

Scott: Try it now.

[Kevin... well, you get the idea by now. Doesn't start]

Scott: Uh- Huh. Hmmm... well maybe we should stay home then, huh? Let's just rent a movie build a fire... yeah, yeah just the two of us... TRY IT NOW!

[Scott slowly moves away from the car as he says this and suddenly turns]

Scott: TRY IT NOW!

[Kevin tries to start the car and it fails]

Scott: TRY IT NOW!

[Kevin tries to start the car and it fails]

Scott: TRY IT NOW!

[Kevin tries to start the car and it fails]

Scott: Dang it!

Kevin: Daniel, it's no use.

Scott: I have an idea!

[Scott opens hood and looks ]

Scott: Okay.. Ah! here's the problem!

[Scott reaches in and pulls out a Toddler]

Scott: Come on you little rascal! One of the Thompson brats. Try it now!

[Kevin tries.. and the car starts!]

Kevin: Eureka!

Scott: Okay.. let's go Scooter!

[We see Scott come to a door with a dog door. He pushes the small boy through the dog door and we hear growling and gnawing noises as the child is dragged into the house, presumably by some big monster dog. Scott doesn't notice, and goes back to the car where Kevin is back in the passenger seat]

Scott: Okay. That's over. Here we come!

[They back out of the driveway, singing merrily]


Credit to Kids in the Hall/Broadway Video