Yo Canada! (July 1, 1995)
on set of Brain Candy. Cut between the five Kids.]
[The Question on screen: "Why are Canadians so funny? Kids in
the Hall. Theory #262"]
Why Canadians are so . . . so funny?
I'm just so bored of this whole topic.
I've ob . . . I've obviously been asked that question a lot .
. . by border guards and . . . and the like.
Canadians are funny because they are a small, small people.
We have a funny inferiority complex. I can't pronounce the word,
but that's what we have.
I just think Canada is a nerd . . .
I find them a dull people.
. . . Thick glasses, walking into walls. God, I'm like stroking
an incredibly expensive painting. Oh, my God.
I'm not sure Canadians are funny.
There's like two million dollars worth of paintings on the set
here. And I'm just like sc--scratching off the oil.
I think they're good hockey players.
Too much oil here. [rubbing the painting] I don't like the way
he bunched it up there.
Canadians are more likely to attend a show under adverse conditions.
You've wanted to kill me for years--kill me now!!
I've heard, and I haven't actually seen any, but the--the people
in America are evil?
[mumbling, might not be right:] I don't--the black population
of Canada can't say, "Yo, Canada." The whites are really in desperate
straights when you try to say, "Yo, Canada."
camera voice: [to Mark] Do you find a--a--a big difference
performing in front of a Canadian audience as opposed to performing
in front of an American audience?
Uh . . . no. [shift eyes, checking with interviewer] Yes. [shifts
eyes] No. [looks down and confidently:] Yes.
Why Canadians are so funny. Well. Oh, jeez. Just never mind. [rips
off mic and leaves.]
[On screen: "Who #@%* cares?"]